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Your Astrological Sign Just Changed, Thanks To NASA

Adam Katz Sinding

We don’t want to be dramatic, but NASA just ruined our lives. For the first time in 3,000 years, they’ve decided to update the astrological signs. This means that the majority of us are about to experience a total identity crisis. Apparently, these changes are due to the fact that the constellations are not in the same position in the sky that they once were, and the star signs are about a month off now, as a result. To further confuse things, there is now a new, 13th sign, called Ophiuchus, which those born between November 29 and December 17 are lucky enough to have to learn to pronounce. Here is NASA’s definitely-not-confusing explanation for this:

“The constellations are different sizes and shapes, so the Sun spends different lengths of time lined up with each one,” they say. “The line from Earth through the Sun points to Virgo for 45 days, but it points to Scorpius for only seven days. To make a tidy match with their 12-month calendar, the Babylonians ignored the fact that the Sun actually moves through 13 constellations, not 12. Then they assigned each of those 12 constellations equal amounts of time. Besides the 12 familiar constellations of the zodiac, the Sun is also aligned with Ophiuchus for about 18 days each year.”

Below, the new astrological breakdown by sign: You may now proceed to enter into a full-blown panic attack, although the silver lining is that this disconcerting news can also be used as an excuse to buy more things.

Capricorn January 20 – February 16

Aquarius February 16 – March 11

Pisces March 11 – April 18

Aries April 18 – May 13

Taurus May 13 – June 21

Gemini June 21 – July 20

Cancer July 20 – August 10

Leo August 10 – September 16

Virgo September 16 – October 30

Libra October 30 – November 23

Scorpio November 23 – November 29

Ophiuchus November 29 –December 17

Sagittarius December 17 – January 20

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